Stargazing for Beginners Read online

  Once the others have gone, and I’ve persuaded Grandad that a soak in the hot tub isn’t ‘just what he needs’, I take Elsa down to the seafront and push her along the prom in her pushchair.

  It’s getting late, and the darkening sky is reflecting on the still sea. We stop at the park at the foot of the Downs and I sit on a swing with Elsa on my lap. ‘So, Mum’s home,’ I say.

  She cranes her neck back to look back at me. ‘Mamama,’ she says.

  ‘That’s right.’ She smiles at me and makes a grab for my face. ‘Ow! I need to cut your nails.’ Then I realise that Mum will do that … and give Elsa her dinner and do up all the poppers on her Babygro tonight. Elsa turns back to face the sea and I push off with my toes and start us swinging. She laughs and I press my nose into her silky hair and smell a mixture of bubble bath and Weetabix. Rose is right. This is the best smell in the world.

  I point up at the sky. The moon has just started to appear, a pale orange disc sitting low in the sky. ‘That’s the moon,’ I say. ‘Moon.’

  ‘Beb,’ she says.

  ‘No, not Meg, moon.’ But she just bangs back against me, trying to get me to swing higher. ‘Nearly fifty years ago,’ I say, ‘two men walked on the moon for the first time. Did you know that the moon has a smell? When the astronauts got back into the lunar module and shook the moon dust from their clothes, it smelt of gunpowder. They could even taste it.’ Elsa settles against me as we float up and down. ‘Then they discovered the switch that they needed to leave the moon had broken so Buzz Aldrin made a new one by sticking a pen in the control panel.’ I breathe in the evening air and stare at the luminescent lump of rock that has been pulling me closer all my life. ‘I think that the moon is the most beautiful thing in the world,’ I say, ‘except for you.’

  ‘Da,’ she says, then she blows a raspberry, then she says, ‘moo’.

  ‘There are no cows here,’ I say. ‘Only seagulls.’

  ‘MOO!’ she says, pointing up at the pale sky.

  I follow her finger and see that she’s pointing right at the golden moon. ‘Moo!’ Elsa says again, ‘Moo!’

  My heart lifts. ‘That’s right,’ I say, ‘that’s the moon.’

  FIFTY-EIGHT

  ‘Stand close to the mirror and tilt your head back.’ I do what Annie tells me. We’re talking on Skype and she’s being my CAPCOM again, helping me get ready for my date with Ed. She wanted to come round here, but I didn’t trust her not to say anything embarrassing in front of Ed. Having Mum around is going to be bad enough.

  ‘And why exactly am I doing this?’ I ask her.

  ‘You’re looking for out-of-sight boogers that might drop down later … See any?’

  ‘God, yes!’ I get a tissue and blow my nose.

  Annie says, ‘Right, now growl at yourself. You’re checking for bits between your teeth.’

  I bare my teeth in the mirror. ‘Grrrr … No bits.’

  ‘I think you’re ready. Nervous?’

  ‘Want to puke.’

  ‘Yeah … don’t do that. Right, now show me how you look.’

  I prop my phone on my desk and take a last look in the mirror. I’m actually wearing a dress. I’ve never been to any of our school discos, but if I’ve learnt anything from Bella this week it’s that some sort of special outfit is expected tonight. It’s been a strange week at school. Ed and I have done a lot of talking and hanging out together, but no more hand-holding. I’ve even wondered if somehow I’ve got it all wrong – if he’s asked me to the dance as a really good friend – but Annie said I was just taking insecurity to a whole new, pathetic level.

  Mum got me the dress from Brighton. I run my hands over the full skirt. I’m fairly confident that no one else will be wearing a dress with the planets printed all over it. ‘I look like me in a dress,’ I say, turning round. ‘I look weird.’

  ‘Not weird,’ says Annie. ‘Cosmic.’

  The doorbell rings. Pongo starts barking and Mum runs past my room. ‘Hurry up!’ she calls.

  ‘Oh, God,’ I say, staring at my phone. ‘He’s here!’

  I can see Annie sitting on her bed wearing a bright red dress. Her white rat, Alice, is curled up on her shoulder. ‘Wow.’ Her eyes go wide. ‘This is it, mate.’

  ‘Wish me luck.’

  ‘No way. You don’t believe in that rubbish.’

  ‘You’re right. Wish me a logical outcome.’

  ‘And what would that be?’

  Up on the wall, Valentina Tereshkova gives me her sternest look, reminding me that good things happen when I tell the truth. I look back at Annie and say, ‘A kiss.’

  ‘Then go get that kiss, space girl!’ she says, then her hand reaches forward and she disappears. Annie doesn’t do goodbyes.

  ‘Come on!’ Mum calls from the hallway.

  I take a deep breath, check my nose one final time, then leave my room. Out in the hallway, Mum holds Elsa and Pongo back while I open the door.

  And there’s Ed, standing there and smiling at me … and looking very casual. He’s wearing jeans and a sweatshirt along with his big parka. Slung over his shoulder is a sports bag.

  ‘Wow, Meg, you look …’ He frowns down at my dress.

  ‘What?’

  ‘Like you might get cold.’

  ‘I’ve got a cardi.’ I grab it off the hook by the door. Mum’s grinning at Ed and I know she’s bursting to talk to him. I need to get us out of here before she asks what his star sign is or tries to touch him to check out his energy.

  ‘But we’re going to be sitting outside for hours,’ says Ed. ‘The asteroid doesn’t pass by until eleven.’

  ‘The asteroid? But what about the school dance?’ I look at my nails. I actually let my mum paint them red to match Mars on my dress. She was in heaven. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

  He grins and shrugs. ‘Romantic surprise? Plus, you told me I was never ever allowed to mention the dance to you.’

  ‘I think you took that a bit literally.’

  ‘Probably, but I’d never take you to the dance. You said you hated them.’ He pats his bag. ‘I thought we’d go on the Downs. I borrowed Raj’s fishing shelter, I’ve got food and we can make a fire.’ He hesitates. ‘Was it a stupid idea? I thought you liked it up there.’

  I actually have to stop myself from hugging him. ‘I love it up there. I’ll get changed.’ I go to my room and while I’m pulling on leggings under my dress and finding my warmest hoodie, I hear Mum chatting to Ed, offering to lend him sleeping bags and cotton wool to light the fire.

  Soon I’m ready. Just before we go, I ask Mum, ‘What time do I need to be back?’

  ‘Any time you like, as long as you look after each other.’ OK, I’m starting to see the benefits of having a mother with no boundaries. ‘Enjoy it not being the end of the world!’ she adds.

  ‘Moo, moo!’ says Elsa, and they both wave goodbye to us.

  ‘Hey,’ says Ed, giving me a nudge as we walk down the wee stairs. ‘How are you?’

  ‘I’m very good,’ I say, as our shoulders brush, then, before I can change my mind, I slip my hand into his. Ed’s fingers curl round mine and he squeezes my hand.

  FIFTY-NINE

  We walk across the Downs for over an hour to get away from the light pollution of town, then set up our asteroid-spotting camp. While Ed puts up the shelter, I find twigs and make a fire.

  ‘That looks a bit professional,’ Ed says, when he sees my pyramid of kindling.

  ‘My mum loves making fires on the beach … or in parks. Basically, anywhere where she’s not supposed to.’ I put a match to the bit of cotton wool I stuffed in at the bottom and the fire crackles to life.

  ‘Look at that!’ says Ed, as flames lick along the twigs.

  ‘We’ll have to let it die out in a couple of hours, or we won’t be able to see the sky properly.’

  We collect a pile of dead wood then sit in the shelter, shoulders touching, and we toast marshmallows. It’s cold because it’s such a clear night. Beyond the glow
of the fire are the dark shadows of trees. It’s quiet too. Every now and then we hear a squeak or a scuffle in the leaves.

  ‘You don’t wish you were at the dance?’ I say.

  He shrugs. ‘No, I don’t need to go. I’ll hear every single detail about it tomorrow from Bella.’

  Bella’s making a big effort with me at school, and I guess I’m making a big effort with her. Yesterday, we were doing an experiment and I asked her if I’d measured a wavelength correctly. She stared at me, open-mouthed, and said, ‘Megara, did you just ask me a question? What is going on with the world?’

  I take a look at Ed. His hood is up and it’s hiding his face. ‘I bet you’d have enjoyed wearing a suit,’ I say.

  He smiles. ‘Yeah, but I don’t need to go to a dance to do that.’

  I stare up at the sky. The moon is beautifully clear. I pass Ed my binoculars so he can see the craters. Somewhere across the hill, a fox barks. ‘A couple of weeks ago,’ I say, ‘I couldn’t have imagined doing this.’

  ‘I could,’ says Ed.

  ‘What, you imagined us sitting in Raj’s fishing shelter on the Downs?’

  ‘The fishing shelter I didn’t anticipate,’ he says. ‘I just imagined being with you and looking up at the sky.’

  A shiver of excitement runs through me and to break the silence, I say, ‘Look,’ and point up. ‘That’s the Andromeda Galaxy.’

  It takes Ed a second to find the galaxy with the binoculars and I have to lean close to him to point it out. ‘How far away is it?’ he asks.

  ‘About two and a half million light years.’

  ‘And I’m looking at it …’ His voice is filled with wonder.

  ‘You’re not looking at it now. You’re looking at it two and a half million light years ago.’

  ‘So if a little alien was on a planet over there, looking through a telescope at Earth, it wouldn’t see us?’

  ‘It wouldn’t even see human beings. They came along two hundred and thirty thousand years later.’

  Ed lowers the binoculars and looks at me. ‘But here we are,’ he says.

  Our faces are centimetres apart. ‘Here we are,’ I say.

  He nods, and to prove the point he leans forward and kisses me, and that spark that’s been pulling us together for days, weeks, maybe even years, bursts into life. His hand draws me close and I hold on tight to his coat and kiss him back. I can taste marshmallows and his lips feel totally alien, but at the same time like something that belongs to me. I kiss Ed King and he kisses me, and I really love my life on planet Earth.

  SIXTY

  ‘Open it! Open it!’ Mum, Elsa and Pongo have piled on to my bed. Elsa is waving an envelope up and down. A thick, white envelope with NASA printed in one corner. Mum pulls it out of Elsa’s hands and passes it to me.

  I run my hands over the smooth surface. ‘I don’t think I won, Mum. It feels like bad news.’

  ‘Look how thick it is,’ she says. ‘How many words do you need to say, “Bad luck, you didn’t win”? Not many. But if you have to include information about flights and hotels …’

  ‘You really think so?’

  ‘I do, but there’s only one way to find out.’

  Elsa jumps up and down, my planets spin on their threads and the fifty-nine female astronauts smile down at me. I pull open the corner of the envelope then stop. ‘I really want to go,’ I say, ‘more than anything in the world.’ I think Mum knows I don’t just mean to Houston. ‘But if I haven’t won, I won’t give up. This is just the start.’

  Mum nods and puts her hands over her eyes, like she can’t bear to watch.

  I take a deep breath, then carefully peel open the envelope. I pull out the folded sheets of paper and smooth them out on my lap. ‘Dear Megara,’ I read, then I stare at the next sentence. I read it again and again.

  ‘Lift-off?’ Mum says.

  I look back up at her. All I can do is smile.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  I’d like to thank the staff at the Physics and Astronomy department at the Sussex University who were so helpful during my research visits. Walking round the PhD research lab was an incredible experience and one I will never forget. I’d particularly like to thank David Daniels from the schools lab who runs inspiring workshops very like the one Meg attended and who so patiently answered all my questions.

  Meg’s beloved science centre is inspired by The Observatory Science Centre at Herstmonceux in East Sussex. It’s a brilliant place and the staff there are passionate about space and physics. The domes exist. The huge telescopes exist. The tea room exists. Go and visit them!

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Before Jenny started writing books about the Ladybirds (Bea, Betty, Kat and Pearl), she was an English teacher at a large secondary school. Although she loved teaching funny teenagers (and stealing the things they said and putting them in her books), she now gets to write about them full-time. When Jenny isn’t thinking about stories, writing stories or eating cake, she enjoys jiving and running around the South Downs. Jenny lives by the seaside with her husband and two small but fierce girls.

  Twitter: @JennyMcLachlan1

  Instagram: jennymclachlan_writer

  www.jennymclachlan.com

  ONE

  A small naked person is licking me. I don’t panic – this happens a lot. The naked person starts kissing my face. I smell Marmite and banana and … hang on … the person is not entirely naked. It’s wearing wellies. Wellies? This is new. And totally unacceptable.

  I grope for my phone … 5.34 a.m.

  5.34 a.m!

  ‘Bea!’ Emma cries. ‘Happy birthday!’

  ‘Go away. It is not my birthday.’ I try to push her out of my bed, but she resists and we start to scuffle. Mistake. For a three-year-old, my sister’s a mean wrestler. I briefly consider being grown-up, but before I know it we’re having a proper fight.

  ‘I got you a present!’ comes her muffled voice from somewhere around my feet.

  ‘Present later?’ I could probably sleep with her down there. It’s not so bad, quite cosy and –

  ‘PRESENT NOW!’ she screams.

  She’s clearly in one of her extra-special moods, so I say what I always say when I want to get rid of her. ‘Did you hear that, Emma?’

  ‘What?’

  ‘I heard Dad’s voice … He’s home! Dad’s home!’ (He isn’t. He’s in Mexico.)

  ‘Daddy!’ She shoots out of my bed and down the stairs, leaving me to roll over and snuggle my face into something warm and squidgy. A forgotten bit of banana, perhaps?

  I sniff it. It’s not banana.

  *

  Two hours later, Emma’s come to the door to see me off to school. Headbutting me in the stomach, she shouts, ‘Love you, frog-nose!’

  Birds fly off our neighbour’s roof.

  ‘Love you, botty-breath,’ I say, pushing her firmly back into the house. I walk down the path. Now is the time the shyness sweeps over me and I leave Real Bea at home and take Shy Bea to school.

  Already, as I walk to the bus stop, Shy Bea is making me hunch my shoulders and stare at the floor. The further I get from my house, with Emma’s broken slide sitting on the patch of tatty lawn, and our red front door, the less I feel like me.

  ‘Though she be but little, she is fierce!’ I whisper under my breath as I approach the Year Elevens who hang out on the wall outside the Co-op. I sit in my usual spot away from the others and get out my phone. One of the boys throws an M&M at me. It bounces off my head and lands on my lap. He laughs and watches to see what I will do. I stare at it. It’s blue.

  Though she be but little, she is fierce, I think.

  Eat the M&M, Bea! Go on, EAT IT!

  I brush it to the floor. Not my fiercest moment.

  I’ve pretty much made myself invisible by the time the bus arrives, and when I drop down into the seat next to Kat she doesn’t even look up. She’s staring into the tiny mirror she always carries somewhere about her person. At first, I think she’s just checking o
ut the perfectness of her blonde, blonde hair, but then she grabs my arm and pulls me closer, hissing, ‘Look behind us!’

  I peer back through the bus, ‘What?’

  ‘It’s him: Ollie “The Hug” Matthews. Oh, God. Don’t look! Look! No. Don’t look. OK. Look now. Soooo hot!’ I sneak a sideways glance at her. Just as I suspected, her mouth is half open and her eyes are all big and puppy-like. She’s doing her ‘Sexy Lady Face’. She looks like Emma when she’s doing ‘a big one’ on the potty.

  ‘Don’t look at me,’ she says. ‘Look at him.’

  And so I look. For once, I can see what she’s getting at. Ollie Matthews has got these kind, brown eyes, sort of tousled hair and shoulders that look a bit like man shoulders and his hands are …

  ‘Bean, are you listening?’ Kat snaps her mirror shut. ‘I think I need to be more realistic and forget about Year Elevens and focus on Year Tens. Also, well, maybe he’s the one? There was “The Hug”, after all.’

  ‘What? He said that was an accident.’

  Kat snorts, ‘It didn’t feel like an “accident”!’

  ‘He thought you were his sister. You’ve got the same coat … that one with the birds on it.’

  ‘He. Is. So. So. Hot. Don’t you think?’ says Kat, ignoring my little slice of REALITY.

  The Hug is listening to his iPod and looking out of the window in a, you know, hot type of way, with his eyes, which are open (sexily), looking at trees … hot trees covered in sexy green leaves. ‘Yeah, Kat,’ I say. ‘Ollie seems –’

  ‘Say it!’ Kat is gleeful. ‘Go on, say it. Say Ollie Matthews is HOT.’ I shut my mouth. ‘Say it say it say it!’

  ‘OK. I can see, from your point of view, that he could be described as … hot.’

  ‘Yes! He totally is.’ She grabs my arm. ‘Now tell me everything you know!’

  I have a great memory. ‘Year Ten.’

  ‘I know that.’

  ‘Was in Bugsy Malone last year.’